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Dialogue vs. Action Tags
“Come with me,” she said softly before spinning away, her longhair fanning out as she did so.
“Come with me.” She crooked her finger before spinning on her heel, her long hair fanning out as she did so, and sauntered away.
Which engages you more? Which one paints a picture in your mind and whispers those words in your ear?
My guess is that it’s the second one.
The first quote is a piece of dialogue followed by a dialog tag. It has an adverb to tell the reader how the sentence is said and then describes the action that follows.
The second is a line of dialogue followed by an action tag. There is no telling, there is only action and we allow the reader to hear the line of dialogue however they wish.
Stephen king and almost every traditional editor ever has said to stop using adverbs. They hate them. It is true that when you use an adverb, you are telling rather than showing, but sometimes that’s necessary in order to get the meaning or the feel of the dialogue across to the reader. And, let’s face it, it’s much easier to write.
But by taking the time, the effort, to take out that dialogue tag — or not write it in the first place — and replace it with an action tag, you are bringing your reader closer. You are engaging them deeper into your story.